My Sister

Saturday, November 12, 2011

So these past weeks I have been re-examining my life and making some changes ...I like to call it re-inventing myself and I believe we all need to do that at least once a year .....I think the best time is near the end of a year so you can start the next year with new ideas, views and hopefully new goals and dreams ..........My yesterdays has been so troubling and there have been a few people who has helped me through these troubled times.......I think of my family ....I have 3 brothers and 2 sisters ...Being the oldest it was always so hard to seek help from them ......My two youngest brothers were born after I had left home and me being in a very abusive marriage was not allowed to be in contact with my family so our relationships was close to non existent and it was the same with my youngest sister and other brother .......I left home when I was 15 so they were very young when I left  ....My Dad would always come and get me when I couldn't take anymore and I even remember my oldest brother coming to get me in Nova Scotia and take me up to Ontario Canada and when things got really bad before I left for the final time he would call to check on me and if I didn't answer he would call and get the police to call and check on me ...
I don't know if I ever told him but I was so grateful he did that and that was one of the reasons I made the decision to leave for good ............But the one I am most grateful to is my sister ...She is the second oldest and I can't even imagine where I would be if she had not been there for me no matter how many times I showed up at her door and how many times she had to watch me return to my abusive marriage....She was and still is to this day my best friend and I love her dearly ...They say there is nothing quite like the bond between sisters and I can say that is so true .....I am moving back to Canada soon and I'm going to get to know my brothers and sisters like I never knew them before....I want to feel that sister bond with my youngest sister and I want to be my brothers older sister and let them know they can always count on me but most of all I want to repay my sister that was always my safe place to fall ....I want to be there for her birthdays, go shopping with her, laugh with her and be bestest friends......I wrote the poem that follows for her and tried to let her see all she did for me and what it meant but I couldn't even come close to how I truly feel about this wonderful friend of mine ......

My Sister
It was so hard to know what to say about a sister like you
someone who stands by me no matter what I do
When I think back over the years I can only say
You were my truest friend and its still that way today
You held my hand when things were tough
and gave me safe haven when my life got rough
You were always there and never turned me away
When I was so tired you always gave me a place to lay
Some people would have said I can’t take it anymore
But you would always welcome me when I stood at your door
The closeness and love I feel in my heart for you
I owe you a debt that will be forever overdue
There is no way I could ever pay you all the things I owe
But I can start with these few things I want you to know
You are so special to me I can’t find words to explain
How you helped me to deal with all my heartache and pain
There were so many things I missed in your life
you growing up and sister talks late in the night
I missed when you took that big step and said I do
The birth of your child I wasn’t there to share the joy with you
But I need you to know in my heart I was there
and even if I couldn’t show it I truly did care
So I hope this poem lets you know in a way
you are always in my thoughts even if you are far away

PS...... This is the last step into reinventing ............

5. Every day, go back to that vision of you walking towards your future.
Every morning or evening, close your eyes, and see yourself walking into the rising sun, towards your dreams, and reconnect with why you’re moving toward this new possibility.
Reinvention is neither easy nor always smooth. Often we encounter resistance. We don’t want to let go, even of things that cause us pain or that are obviously already out of our grasp. We often struggle with limiting beliefs or stories about ourselves that hold us back from trying new things.
But there is one way to keep your compass pointed to this new life, even in the midst of any resistance or struggles you may encounter on your path.
Each time you find yourself slipping into old habits—isolating yourself, making excuses not to look for work, procrastinating on a task that might help you advance in your career—don’t bother wondering why you’re doing it or beating yourself up.
Just ask yourself this: “What can I do in this moment to keep moving forward?”
Then, no matter what you feel in the moment—lonely, self-critical, tired, lazy, or disappointed—do something to maintain momentum, even if it’s one small thing. There’s an old adage that says that true courage isn’t about not feeling fear; it’s about feeling fear and acting anyway.
Choose courage instead of letting your fear choose your future for you.


Butter - Cup said...

Thank you SissyPooo..Your words means so much to me and believe me I cant wait for you to move here so we can do things together...I love you and next week is the week......

Mich9 said...

google knows it :-D



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“But is it such a bad thing to live like this for just a little while? Just for a few months of one's life, is it so awful to travel through time with no greater ambition than to find the next lovely meal? Or to learn how to speak a language for no higher purpose than that it pleases your ear to hear it? Or to nap in a garden, in a patch of sunlight, in the middle of the day, right next to your favourite fountain? And then to do it again the next day?”
Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

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