I just want to be Happy

Sunday, January 18, 2015

The last few days have been filled with much more pain than usual and it's getting to the point where I am unsure of how much of this I can take .....

I have tried so many things .... I had some people from a church come by and pray for me ... I have even knelt down by my bed and talked with God in a reverend way and asked him very quietly to take my pain away ....I have considered seeing my doctor about medical marijuana ....I even made an appointment to get a second opinion on what is wrong ....

I am desperate to get this fixed or at least on some kind of medication that will bring relieve  .......

There has to be help out there somewhere .... I am not a druggie but if it means no pain then bring it on ...Would you rather I be addicted to pain relievers or pain ...... All you pharmaceutical places I have one question ....Why not me? I have money I can pay..... please


I just want days when I can wake up from a non - drug induced sleep and not be stiff and unable to stand ... I want to be able to get out of bed without having to slowly and painfully move each part of my body so I can stand ......I'm sick of swollen ankles and wrist and black circles under my eyes

I just want to be HAPPY

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“But is it such a bad thing to live like this for just a little while? Just for a few months of one's life, is it so awful to travel through time with no greater ambition than to find the next lovely meal? Or to learn how to speak a language for no higher purpose than that it pleases your ear to hear it? Or to nap in a garden, in a patch of sunlight, in the middle of the day, right next to your favourite fountain? And then to do it again the next day?”
Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

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